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From Faith to Idol workship

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This part of my life is called " Change". I was never a religious person. I always prayed in respect for my mother wish and desire for me . I always believed that  positive  energy is within us and not outside in form of idols. i used to think it is always your handwork, sincerity and persistence,  that earns a good life and fortune. I used to blame people for their situation as they could have worked harder to make a better living . I used to not believe in superstitions and all those tactic people do and preach to make life comfortable. Visiting "Guruji" and self proclaimed " Baba"to find solutions to one's life problem is most regretful thing a person can do. I used to hate at idea of having to do anything like that. I believed life takes its own course, why should we try and change the faith and destiny. Our external actions and "Totka" to solve life issues might alter the path set for us and we might land up somewhere else other than ...
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When time is hard !

When  time is hard when time is not in your favour , the only thing you can do is "wait". Wait for this tough and bitter time to get over to a bright day. Wait to move from a heavy heart to a love filled heart. To cursing your life to  loving every moment is wait. Patience become the greatest and most possessed virtue.Keep moving forward. Patience and believe that you can do it.  Keep trying trying even if it fail all the time. Keep trying even if you see darkness in future. Hope never dies. Hope keeps one moving. Hope for a better and healthy tomorrow. Hope your dreams stay alive and keep pushing you to get better of yourself. Can you stand this tough time or the tide is going to take one  down ? Can you emerge stronger in this wind ? Can you pull your loved one above this  sinking life ? Can you ? Can I?
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My twin boys ~ Hridansh & Hriday

I couldn't believe I am back to my most favourite thing - writing. Life is not the same anymore . It have many twist and turn now. It has many responsibilities now. It has much love and much naughtiness now. Life is like "living in the  moment". I am mother of two cute little angels. I gave birth to my twin boys in 2017. My munchkins  are ,one and a half year old,  sweet and  naughty and  full of tantrums toddlers now . They are my everyday.  They are my meaning to life now. I wake up to them ,  be with them and sleep with them . Life is like a lemon now. Sweet and tangy . You can take it with a pinch of salt or make  fresh sweet lemonade. My sweetheart  suprise me everyday with how soon and easily they grasp things. Even smallest of thing is a learning for them . What is apple what is banana! It is simple amazing to see them beginning to claim their  independence. It's so much joy to see them assert their identity and show their pers...
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where you began- where you end; it may be as long a jorney.. change can change you so much that you stop recognizing yourself.. change can cut the branches of you that the part that is left is as ugly or lifeless.. change for yourself.. but life - people - incidents can turn you upside down... i now stand at my fathers shoes- it feels i face the same what he ever went through. i could say the same words - he spoke once.. word are lost- grammer is forgotten - sentences are half broken;
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pain i keep on closed in...

i keep bleeding.. i keep keep bleeding in love... i keep bleeding.. i keep bleeding in love.. hard to define.. but blood can be seen all over around my heart.. it has cracks.. it has split up in two.. three.. no count how many pieces... it has broken.. broken again again with wonderful hands of life.. the beautiful color of life is with me as my bleeding heart.. bandaid didn't work.. surgery will not work.. it has to to tied up tightly with thick and impermeable wall. to protect it.. but it will split up again.. it will fall apart into something only i will be able to see the blood.. someting broken can never be glued.. it is irrepairable damage .. tangible only to person it belong to.. only i can see the loss.. only i feel the pinch.. only i can feel the storm in me.. only i can feel the moment broken into and inertia left disturbed.. it is human nature to cover up with plastic smiles and plastic faces... it is the call of this tough and so called " practical" world to ...
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Run to you...

melodious lines of songs; i am coming back to you; come back to me; etc etc... running back to one you left... returning to reason who pushed you away.. wanting to return to where you begin your journey to so called "move on".. words with no literal meaning coz not felt but spoken.. emotions not echoed in heart, but in surroundings.. life is not lived once , but every time it is felt deeply... joy, sorrow, pleasure, love, anger, aggression, passion.. are lived at extremes.. it is the perception of a man who makes him sensitive to momemts.. not easy to identify what one is wanting to feel, but it is the connection .. that invisible wiring.. that unfelt untouched strings of heat.. that make u feel a deep pain in ur chest.. Bryan Adams,, the great legend.. his songs.. " when you love someone, pls forgive me, coming back to you".. may not have been so true unless felt closely..
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surprises of life

Who would deny the love and excitement when met with a pleasant surprise.. who would not like to be given a surprise to cherish and remember.. surprises are unexpected moments of life, welcomed with love or agony.. gifted with twins is the most beautiful surprise to a newly made mother.. Geting well deserved well spoken well known son in law -another satisfying surprise to a anxious father.. scoring much above expectation - a hurray! surprise to a nervous student.. taken through the most loved moments and to most emotional journey can be lovable surprise to lovers. surprise by default are happy and positive one.. Negative and sad and tragic are not refereed as surprise..
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